If all you ever do with your life is photosynthesize, then you'll deserve every hour of your sleepless nights

I don't own any of these photos, they're just ones I found on the following sites:

http://www.them-thangs.com/

http://ffffound.com/

http://jjjjound.com/

http://9gag.com/

http://www.death-riders.com/

So here's to drinks in the dark...

Another Winter is here and once again out come the wools, wellies and hot chocolates, while we wave a mournful goodbye to any trace of warmth. Come on now, it's not all bad. There's the beloved Christmas menus for one, the end of X Factor is nigh, and have you seen that John Lewis advert?! Of course you have (oh cynics, please let us have this one?). So don't despair, there's lots to look forward to this Winter, even if Saturday nights spent in front of the telly with your slipper socks don't appeal to you...which they most definitely should.



TIGHTS

I'm not really sure where this obsession has come from but a simple pair of black opaques just won't cut it any more. Whether you like them ribbed, coloured or even dotty, the collections this Winter are full of variety.

House of Holland Alphabetights, £12.99

Gold by Giles, Seamed Lurex tights, £9.99

Cable-Knit tights, £9.99

ALL THINGS FLORENCE

Everytime we turn on the radio, open a magazine or switch the telly on these days, we either get lovely Florence Welch, or someone talking about lovely Florence Welch. With the suberb new album 'Ceremonials' out, this praise is entirely just, and I for one can't get enough of her haunting, still shockingly original voice.

Florence and the Machine 'Ceremonials', available now.

Cover of Drake and Rihanna's Take Care for BBC Radio 1 Live Lounge

PARKS AND REC

Now that Towie's left us pale and plain-vagina'd, and we can no longer drool over the clothes and champagne in Made In Chelsea, I think we're all in need of a little pick me up. NBC's Parks and Recreation is the perfect remedy to the midseason television lull. Starring the exceptional Amy Poehler and now in its fourth season, Parks and Rec just gets better and better. Never has a show made me laugh until I couldn't physically stand it before now.



STARBUCKS

It's baaaaaack. And I'm so excited. Forgive me people cool enough to not get excited by the fact that a huge corperation briefly changes the colour of its cups, as I am sadly that uncool. I mean, Praline Mocha? Are you kidding me? Yum.

Video of the week/month/year/century etc.

Utterly in love with Best Coast's new video for 'Our Deal' directed by the always amazing Drew Barrymore, and starring some of the best young American actors including Chloe Moretz, Alia Shawkat, Donald Glover and Tyler Posey. Love the ambiguous time setting, Romeo and Juliet with an Outsiders twist, and the amazing costumes, as well as the great song!

See it on US MTV here
or here elsewhere.

Enjoy!

Dip Dye

We all know that familiar feeling...'I would definitely suit an electric blue bob...or maybe a red perm, hmm'. Hair boredom is what led Britney to become a balding maniac, and Christina to whatever the hell that frizzy octopus leg mess was on her head. So when I felt hair boredom creep up on me recently, I decided to go in a new direction (I'm naturally dirty blonde, have dyed my hair brown for a couple of years, and am now back to blonde). After being struck with the urge to hack it off into a choppy bob, which would look far more Joan Collins than Scarlett, I decided to try my hand at dip dying. For those that don't know, dip dye is the recent style of having two tone hair, usually starting darker and getting lighter, sometimes with colour towards the bottom.

Drew Barrymore's beautifully textured dip dye



Lauren Conrad's bleach blonde tips

So to get this look, you have to 'ombre' your hair. This is really easy to do, and as you're dying only the ends, it's not the end of the world if you damage your hair and you can just trim it. I used Jerome Russell B Blonde Hair Lightener Kit, which was really cheap and quick. Simply mix the bleach together, and apply the bleach to ends of your hair. I started by applying dye to the bottom 3 inches of my hair for about 10 minutes, and then went up another couple of inches, to get more of a gradient. I left this in for another 10 minutes, and then rinsed it out. It's super easy to do, and creates great results for a low price.

Hair all ombred-up, I decided to colour the ends, choosing pink and purple. After a bit of research, I decided to use Fudge's Paint Box range, using Purple Haze and Pink Moon.

I split my hair into 2 layers, and covered about 5 inches of the bottom layer in purple, and then applied pink top the bottom 3 inches of the top layer. I washed it off after 20 minutes and these were the results...

And when dry...

Not the best quality photos but I was really pleased with the results, and definitely recommend taking the plunge into dip dye!

Biarritz

10 days of relaxing in the sun, sipping mojitos and flipping through Cosmo right? That's the point of holidays unless I'm very much mistaken. Alas, this isn't always the case. For us, a little get away to the South of France resulted in 1 lost passport and 2 lost cameras, 2 awful nights that ended bitterly around 10am, 2 encounters with rather pissy French police, and 3 nights of screaming arguments, with only 3 days of sun. Not exactly what we had in mind, but there was some fun had at times.

Tips for Biarritz

• Try and go towards the end of July or August, as the weather was more than disappointing in early July.
• Be prepared for boredom! Whilst this is a stunning town, it is built around the beach, and if it's too cold, there's not a huge amount to do, check out the aquarium or the museum of chocolate on those not so sunny days.
• For an incredible meal, try L'Atelier (make sure you try the breathtaking courgette soup, and the explosive carrot and turmeric mousse).
• Have a day trip to Spain, which is easily accessible by train or car.



La Grande Plage



One of many stunning sunsets



One of many stunning platters!



The beach at Bidart on a rare sunny day

Musee De La Mer







Cool town, evening in the city, dressing so fine and looking so pretty

Being a lady-of-lists, my upcoming holiday of course required hours of scrolling through website after website, looking for various pre-holiday checklists, plans and playlists. Much to my despair, I could find NOTHING telling me exactly what I wanted to hear...'don't worry, there is still time, you don't need 12 weeks of dieting. You will look and feel just splendid'. My squashy, pasty body began to tremble with fear. Without Cosmo or Glamour giving me a holiday plan, what I am to do?? I can't be left to my own devices surely? What if I under pack? I really can't survive two whole weeks without my pineapple print knee socks. And surely this silver lipstick will come in handy, no? So, with 8 tabs on 2 windows, my many girlie bibles, and my trusty Moleskine I began my own compilation of tips and checklist to try and minimise the last minute holiday panic.

Before you go.

Body:

Exfoliate and get rid of that stubble. See those lovely smooth Blake Lively-esque legs? Easy peasy! Although annoyingly hard to maintain. Make sure you get rid of all those whiskers, whether you choose to shave, hair removal, or if you're brave, wax. Now here's the important bit...exfoliate! The quickest way to get gorgeously silky pins. My favourite has to be FCUK's Polished Sugar Scrub if not just for it's incredible smell. Not only does it leave your skin smooth and well buffed, it's also perfect preparation for fake tan.


Tan tan tan. No longer is fake tan the international flag of an Essex Girl! Now, along comes gradual tanning moisturiser to minimise those unsightly streaks and the blinding shade of orange.
Ambre Solaire No Streaks Bronzer is perfect for a quick, easy and even tan.
If you want something a bit longer lasting, but still nice and light, you can't beat Dove's Summer Glow Nourishing Body Lotion (and it's nice and cheap).
If you're serious about you tan, LOreal Sublime Bronze Self-Tanning Fresh Feel Gel does a great job of copying that lovely biscuit colour (but beware of streaky wrists and feet...I had to learn the hard way).


Nails. Ideally we'd all be lucky enough to swan off to a salon and get our feet scrubbed and rubbed to perfection, but sadly this isn't always possible. Fear not! A good nail file and a lick of paint will do the job. Simply give your nails a quick soak (add a couple of drops of olive oil for extra softness), cut and file, push back the cuticles, buff, and choose your colour. For a beach trip, nudes are perfect as any chips are far less noticeable. With dark colours, always try and bring the bottle with you to touch up if you need to.

              A few tips!

-Keep your nail polish in the fridge and it'll dry much faster.

-If you're in a hurry, gently run cold water over your freshly painted nails and they'll dry (still be careful though)

-In cases of gloopy nail polish, a few drops of nail polish remover in the bottle and shaken should make it usable again.



Hair and face. Try and use a hair mask a few days before you go, so your hair is healthy and manageable. I swear by Tresemme Thermal Recovery Repair Tub, as I like to regularly abuse my hair with straighteners, however I'm dying to try out some home remedies! http://www.sheknows.com/beauty-and-style/articles/805126/homemade-hair-masks. For us blondies, John Frieda Sheer Blonde Go Blonder lightening spray is an excellent top up for fading colour.

Make sure you keep your face and neck well moisturised (cleanse, tone, moisturise, listen, repeat and put to use!), and give your teeth a bit of sparkle with Pearl Drops Daily Shine Whitening Toothpaste. A trick to even whiter teeth is, believe it or not, baking soda! A little bit on top of your toothpaste (you can even do it directly on your toothbrush) and it really does help to remove stains.

So by now you should be used to people rushing up to you shouting 'Oh Megan, Transformers just won't be the same without you!', but we're not done yet. You've still got that pesky suitcase. So here's my ESSENTIAL holiday items:

-3 vests/t shirts

-2 skirts

-3 dresses

-3 pairs of shorts

-2 cardigans/jumpers

-3 pairs of shoes: sandals, wedges, heels

-3 bikinis/swim suits.

-Hair brush plus dryer/straightener

-Shampoo and conditioner

-Deodorant and perfume

-Hair ties/clips

-Sun tan lotion/after sun

-Make up (tinted moisturiser, lip balm, and mascara are essential)

-Phone/keys/wallet

-Chargers

-Camera

-Documents-passport, insurance, check in details

-Currency

-Book/magazine/notebook

Of course, this should suffice if your are a sane person, but if you have the need to bring your entire wardrobe like me, I have only one tip: ROLL don't FOLD. You can fit about three times the amount in, and yes, it will most likely crease, but it's worth it if I can bring 8 pairs of shorts. Start with the bigger items, and you'll find that when rolled up, these will take up FAR less space, and then you can simply tuck the smaller things in. Put bikinis/socks/tights inside your shoes, and this will not only save room, but ensure your shoes don't get squashed.

When you get there:

Unpack (don't leave it for later, it will never get done!), freshen up, and go and explore. This will give you a chance to find your bearings and any places you fancy going for a bite to eat. It's probably not a great idea to go out on a messy one on your first night, as you'll no doubt want to wake up fresh and ready to hit the beach the next day. Anyway, happy holidaying, and I'll leave you with some all-important holiday songs!

1.The Lovin' Spoonful-Summer In The City

2. Darwin Deez-Radar Detector

3. Flight Facilities-I Crave You

4. Justice-D.V.N.O

5. Tinie Tempah ft Swedish House Mafia-Miami 2 Ibiza

6. Florence and the Machine-Dog Days Are Over

7. Corrine Bailey Rae-Put Your Records On

8. Battles-Ice Cream

9. Foster the People-Pumped Up Kicks

10. Pete Jorn and Scarlett Johansson-Relator

Out in the dark the world is still rolling, kids in their cars, cigarette smoking

I love a lazy day. A day designed for leggings, wine and bacon sandwiches. And of course what do all of these things orbit around? That's right...television. Whether it's Jamie's Food Revolution, Geordie Shore, or Misbehaving Mums to be, trashy television is at the center of my lazy days. I'll saunter out of bed around 11, make a half-arsed attempt at getting dressed (this usually involves swapping pajama bottoms for trackie bottoms), make a cup or tea and bacon sandwich (none of this BLT shit on a lazy day, I want squishy bread, bacon and ketcup, with maybe a drizzle of maple syrup, yum yum) and then plonk myself in the middle of the sofa and turn on the tv. I pointlessly flick through the channels, all the time knowing I'm going to end up watching a trashy Channel 4 or BBC3 documentary about drunks in Kings College Hospitals or binge eating pregnant women. 'God you disgusting fat slut, you don't deserve children!!' I shout to the range of young mothers smoking 20 a day, honestly believing this will strengthen their baby's heart, whilst munching self-righteously on last nights leftovers and gulping down the Pinot. 'How DARE you treat you body like that!' (gulp, gulp, munch, munch). Of course, it's ok when I do it, because it's just a one off! (ahem) and at least I know it's bad for me, I tell myself over and over again. As the disgust turns to boredom, I know I need to step up my game. 10pm on a Monday approaches and I cannot wait to chastise the snobby brats on E4's Made in Chelsea. How dare they have such nice clothes and money! I want to hate them, truly I do! But uhoh, what's this? Hugo, how could you do that to Millie? Spencer, why Frunda when you can have Caggie! How dare that pompous arse suggest Binky has cellulite!! And just like that...just like I got sucked in to The Only Way Is Essex and Jersey Shore, it's happened...I care. I know it's bad for me, but I can't help it. Like these teen mothers poisoning their babies, I'm poisoning my mind. What makes it worse is that I know it.
Monday night fizzles away in a mixture of excitement and disgust, like when you slump into McDonalds hungover and order not only a Big Mac but chicken nuggets as well. 'Tonight' I tell myself, 'I will watch the news. I shall LISTEN to and ENJOY the news'. Tuesday night arrives. I've swapped my wine for water, my trackies for trousers, and I'm ready to go. I turn on the telly, and disaster strikes. Two words I cannot ignore, under ANY circumstances. Geordie. Shore. No...it can't be...a Geordie Snooki? How can I possibly resist? Well, that's obvious...I can't. Faster than The Situation can sexually assult a girl, I am into my pj's and a bottle of wine. And you know what? I couldn't be happier.

"Totes man, totes, of course"-Fredrik, Made In Chelsea

When the sun says Howdy...

So we've experienced an unusual amount of sunshine here in London recently (yay Global Warming!), meaning the six packs are coming out (of beer of course) and the posh girls once again begin profusely deny any use of fake tan (it's gradual tanning moisturiser, duh). Every morning windows across the city are opened and the rooms are instantly flooded with the scent of distant barbecues; every evening filled with the clash of various radio stations and the clinking of glasses as we take advantage of the many bank holidays.

This month we can expect to see a flood of tourists pouring in for...can you guess? Well, if you can't then lucky you, as it's hard to walk down a street these days without being confronted by Wills and Kate masks (£4!!!), mugs, plates...you name it, it exists, the strangest of these being condoms ('Don't be silly, wrap your Willy!') and fake nails with their portrait on. Insane products aside, I am a bit disappointed to be in Paris at the weekend, missing out on all the street parties and excitement. I must say I had a great Hovis-advert-esque image of everyone carting their dinner tables outside and slow motion laughing and drinking Pimms whilst the kids run around stealing ham sandwiches.

Royal condoms, slogan being 'Lie back and think of England!'

Feel your garden's lacking something? Well fear not! B&Q have launched a pair of Royal Wedding gnomes based on what the couple will look like in 50 years!

Papa John's specially designed pizza....I think I just died inside.

Whether you're already flying your St George's flag proudly out the window, or can't wait for this royal waste of time and money to be over, it is unavoidable, however check out some of these alternative events if you fancy something a bit different http://www.timeout.com/london/feature/965/royal-wedding-events-in-london/2

So whip out the jugs of home made lemonade and strawberries and cream and enjoy the sun whilst it lasts, with or without the Royals!

Drink up baby, stay up all night

In yet another flurry of packing and moving, I am once again settled in lovely London, this time in Camden which is the best place to live. The city is now literally on my doorstep, so there are no excuses not to be frolicking about in this brilliant sunshine we've been having! And what better to do on a sunny afternoon than drink! Yes, it's time to rediscover the joys of day drinking. Sun and London, such a rare but wonderful combination that truly does have a magical effect on people. Gone is the hustle bustle, the awkward silences and reserved British humour...everyone is suddenly alight with joy and laughter as they get together in a pub garden and spend the afternoon sipping away on Pimms. Ok so it's hardly hot, but who cares, we have cashmere shawls for a reason, and you just cant beat a good heavy knit, but the light evenings, daffodils and pastel-y nail polishes have such an uplifting effect on everyone it's hard not to get carried away! So, get yourself down the pub, go see one of these http://www.viewlondon.co.uk/cinemas/outdoor-film-events-feature-232.html and drink yourself into winter!

Mama don't take my Kodachrome away

I don't own any of these photos, they're just ones I found on the following sites:

http://www.epiclylaterd.com

http://www.50yearstorm.net

http://www.them-thangs.com/

http://ffffound.com/

http://jjjjound.com/

http://9gag.com/